Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Amsterdam part 3

From the middle of the Central Station – which is mostly under construction, but a great way to get anywhere in the city – you can easily walk down the main tourist street in Amsterdam. It’s all tourist gift shops and expensive fast food until you hit Dam Square.

In the middle of all the tourist traps is the Sex Museum. Ryan really wanted to see that. I was more curious than anything else. It’s the biggest tourist trap in the neighborhood, but definitely worth a visit. It’s not for prudes or the faint of heart. Some of the displays are extremely graphic. There were a lot of modern x-rated pictures and playing cards which seemed kind of pointless. You can easily find all of that online. There was a display of older “vintage” sex pictures from 50 to 100 years ago – porn through the ages. That was more interesting. It shows that people have always been hound dogs. What I liked were the mannequins and animatronics. They had a mini Red Light District with animatronic hookers and johns. There was also an animatronic Marilyn Monroe posing nude for a photographer whose pants bulged.

Amsterdam has a long cultural history of which the people should be immensely proud. This wasn’t it.


Animatronic Marilyn Monroe


Animatronic hooker


Porn through the ages

Monday, November 28, 2011

Amsterdam part 2

Dam Square is pretty much downtown Amsterdam. It has the Royal Palace, but the Queen doesn’t live there. It has the New Church, which is actually very old. It has Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum, which is kind of creepy. And the National Monument, which reminded me of Trajan’s Column. I think it’s a European thing to have large poles in the middle of squares as monuments. We Americans never got into that.

Dam Square has a lot of tourist shopping and all kinds of food from all over the world. They were having some kind of electric car show one day [10/26/11] and there were all these tiny electric cars all lined up across the square. I doubt it looks like that every day.


Royal Palace


Car show at Madame Tussaud’s

Friday, November 25, 2011

Thanksgiving 2011




Thanksgiving isn’t very popular in Hong Kong. I haven’t seen any restaurants with special Thanksgiving menus. I really wouldn’t consider fried rice and noodle soup a Thanksgiving dinner anyway. I’ve seen a few places with special menus, but nothing I consider Thanksgiving.

One place had roast duck and pumpkin soup. Another place had ham and baked potato soup. A lot of places had various chicken dishes – chicken is very popular in Hong Kong – but that’s not Thanksgiving to me.

What I really miss is pumpkin pie. There’s no pie to speak of here, let alone pumpkin pie. There are tiny desserts that they call pies, but nothing like a real pie. They also tend to make the crust without butter, which is not how you make pie crust. The Chinese have done some great things with food over the years, but they just don’t appreciate dessert.



Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Spa Day

Ryan got me the best gift for my birthday – a day of pampering at a luxurious spa. Hong Kong is famous for its spas, but I’ve never been to one. Mostly because they’re expensive and we’ve been trying to save money. I guess now that we’ve spent most of it on Europe, it’s ok to indulge a little bit extra.

The spa treated me like a princess as soon as I walked in the door. One woman gave me a cup of herbal tea while another washed and massaged my feet. This alone would be great after a day of walking around, but there was so much more.

They wanted me to put on a robe and put my clothes in a basket. They said my clothes would be cleaned & pressed by the time I was finished. This seemed unnecessary since they were already pretty clean, but I realized by the end of the day that I was so scrubbed and detoxified that it only made sense to wear freshly laundered clothes. Some people probably go there after a day of walking around Hong Kong and getting hot and sweaty. Wearing those clothes after the spa wouldn’t be right.

The robe was purely for modesty since it didn’t stay on very long. They took me to an indoor homemade waterfall shower. It was basically a shower, but it looked like a tropical waterfall. A middle aged Chinese lady washed me with a salt scrub – like a bar of soap, but made with salt instead of soap. At first it was weird having a girl wash me. I’m pretty much used to bathing myself, except when Ryan joins me – and then he mostly just concentrates on my tits. It didn’t take long for me to relax and let the pampering happen.

They put me in a very hot bath after the shower. I love soaking in a bathtub and I wish we had one in our apartment, but this one was too hot. It was hard to get into at first, but I got used to it and as soon as I was ready to just sit there the whole day, they had me get out and go into a cold bath. Going back and forth is supposed to help with circulation. After I got used to the cold bath, they put me back in the hot one. I liked going from cold to hot. Hot to cold was an acquired taste.

I was back in my robe after being cleaned and circulated and away to another room. The robe came off again and they had me lay face down on a table. They smeared mud all over my back, butt and legs. They put hot towels on the mud and very carefully helped me roll over without disturbing the mud towels. Then they smeared mud all over my front. That felt unusual because I could see what they were doing and also because they were very thorough. They put that mud everywhere. Once I was coated in mud from the neck down, they wrapped my front in hot towels. The towels were soaked in some kind of oil, but I couldn’t tell what it was. It smelled kind of like vanilla. After the towels, they wrapped me in a few layers of sheets and blankets. I was like a big human burrito.

While I lay there wrapped and completely helpless, a young Chinese lady gently wiped my face with a hot towel. She gave me a mini face massage with some kind of sponge looking thing and then gave me a scalp massage, which was awesome. Ryan likes to play with my hair, but this girl really knew how to get in there and work it.

They unwrapped me and gave me a bottle of water, which I emptied in seconds after that mud wrap, and took me to another room. There was no robe this time, but I was plastered in mud. Another Chinese lady hosed me down with a removable shower head – every shower in Hong Kong has one – and scraped off the mud with a curved wooden stick. When I was completely mud-free, she toweled me off and rubbed lotion all over my mudless body. Back on went the robe and we were off to yet another room.

I took of the robe again and lay down on the massage table. A Chinese lady covered my butt with a warm towel and dripped oil on my back. The towel seemed unnecessary since she had just seen me naked as a dolphin. I wasn’t sure if it was for her modesty or mine. I went from robed to naked to toweled so many times it all seemed kind of silly.

The massage was great. She worked from my shoulders down to my butt then from my feet up to my butt. My butt seemed to be the center of gravity. Eventually, she took the towel off and worked on my butt itself.

Normally, someone grabbing my butt doesn’t really do much for me, but this was a professional who really knew what she was doing. The leg part was excellent. I need to find a much less expensive place to get leg massages on a regular basis.

She put the towel back on after she had me turn over. She did more shoulder work and worked on my arms. She gave a great hand massage that I wasn’t expecting. When you say massage, I think shoulders and legs. When she was doing my stomach, she worked her way up to my breasts. I was a little surprised when she first touched them. I wasn’t expecting a “special service” massage. This didn’t seem like that kind of place. A friend told me later that they always do your breasts during a full body massage. Maybe that’s why they call it full body. You can tell it’s legitimate by the way they do it. If it feels like your boyfriend, it’s special service. If it feels like a trained masseuse, it’s a massage.

Again she went for the legs and again I was in heaven. A few times while she was doing my upper thighs, she brushed against my special place, but it was more like good touch than bad touch. I never got the impression anything untoward was happening. There were only a couple of times that day that I felt uncomfortable and I’m sure it was more about things in my head than anything they were doing. Ryan says I’m uncomfortable with public nudity and that’s absolutely true.

After the full body massage, a different Chinese lady sat me down in a comfortable reclining chair and put seaweed goo all over my face. I was so relaxed and the chair was so comfortable that before I knew it I was asleep. The next thing I know, I’m walking around the spa naked, except for a towel wrapped around my hair. The spa is full of Japanese ladies in kimonos and they’re all bowing as I walk by. Then I see a sign in Chinese that reads “NO NUDITY!” with a big exclamation point. Suddenly all the Japanese ladies are pointing at me and giggling the way Japanese geishas do in inaccurate movies. I take the towel off my head to cover my nudity and my hair is bright blue. I run out of the spa and onto the crowded Hong Kong sidewalk in only a towel and blue hair. It starts to rain and my towel and blue hair get wet. I run into a park and I’m in the middle of a nudist colony. There are a bunch of naked Chinese people looking at me and I see a sign in Chinese that reads “NO TOWELS!” The naked Chinese people point at me and giggle like Japanese geishas.

One of the spa ladies woke me up and took the seaweed mask off my face. They did some more work on my face with lotions and oils and I don’t know what while two other Chinese ladies gave me a manicure and pedicure.

After they were completely finished with me, they handed me my freshly laundered clothes all folded and pressed. When I was dressed and ready to leave, I wondered how I should tip. I don’t even know how many different ladies worked on me. What’s the standard tip for a day of pampered paradise? They told me not to tip at all and that everything was included and fully paid.

I went home after all that hard work and took a nap. I don’t know if I’ve ever had a better birthday.

Monday, November 21, 2011

21st Birthday




Happy birthday to me. I turn 21 tomorrow. That’s a big milestone where I come from because you can legally drink. Here in Hong Kong, you can legally drink at 18. So now I can do what I’ve been able to do since we got here. You can also legally drink at 18 in Rome & Amsterdam. Outside of the United States, I don’t know where turning 21 matters.

It’s hard to believe it’s almost been a year in Hong Kong. Things sure do change. When we came here we didn’t know anything about this city, Chinese culture, living in another country or speaking the language. A year later and I think I know how to get around Hong Kong pretty well. I’m just starting to understand the culture and how different it is to live in another country. I still can only say a few phrases in Chinese. It’s a difficult language to learn, but I’m getting better all the time. I couldn’t get much worse.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Amsterdam part 1

Our hotel in Amsterdam was very close to Dam Square, lots of shopping and Central Station in one direction, the Flower Market, lots of bars and clubs and all the museums in the other direction. It seems like a pretty small city, much smaller than Rome, and you can walk to just about everything. If there’s something that’s too far to walk, they have an excellent tram system that’s very easy to navigate and goes everywhere. Instead of paying with coins, you use a pre-paid card. It’s so much easier. Lots of cities have subway systems where you can’t see where you’re going. The Amsterdam trams are at street level and you can see everything. It’s like a fast, clean, comfortable and efficient bus that you don’t have to be poor and dirty to ride.

We had a view of the Singel canal and a couple of house boats from our room. Some people live on boats in the canal full time.

We were also very close to the Allard Pierson Museum, an archeological museum that focuses on places like ancient Rome. Since we were just in Rome and saw the ancient sites in person, The museum was more interesting than it would have been otherwise.


Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Rome part 7

The Trevi Fountain needs no introduction. If you’ve ever been to Rome or seen any movies set in Rome, you’ve seen it. Audrey Hepburn goes to it in Roman Holiday. Anita Ekberg swims in it in that Fellini movie. She was really beautiful back then.

They say if you throw a coin in the fountain, you’ll return to Rome one day. I threw in a couple coins just to be sure. But not three. I didn’t need that song stuck in my head all day.

It was also very crowded all the time, but it’s one of those things that everybody’s looking at from the same direction. You can take pictures of it on the busiest day and you’d never know there were a hundred people standing next to you when you did.

It was only a few blocks up the street from our hotel, so we went there more than a few times on the way to other places. It’s like Avenue of the Stars in Hong Kong. Once you’ve seen it, you’ve seen it. There’s not much reason to go back, but I always walk along the harbour whenever I’m in the neighborhood.


Trevi Fountain
Imagine a million people in every other direction but this


Vittorio Emanuele Monument
Imagine a million cars driving past

Monday, November 14, 2011

Rome part 6

The Sistine Chapel was always at the top of my list of things to see in Rome. Michelangelo was a genius. To get to it, you have to go through a few other rooms with art by people like Raphael and Bernini. The whole Vatican museum was very impressive.

You’re not allowed to take pictures inside the Sistine Chapel, and it’s a rule they take seriously. I saw a few people try to sneak out their cameras and the guards were on them right away. You can’t get any good shots anyway unless you have a very good camera. The room is too dark without flash and flash won’t work because the ceiling is too far away. You can take pictures in the main hall of St Peter’s church, but they don’t want you to use flash.

After waiting in a very long line to get into the church, we waited in a very long line to go to the top of the huge dome. There’s an elevator that goes to the top, but that line was ridiculous. Instead, we waited in a shorter line to climb up hundreds of stairs. At the end you’re in a very narrow spiral staircase with hundreds of other people. It’s too small to stop and take a break and too crowded to let others pass. Getting to the top was hell, but the views of Rome were heavenly.

We went to St Angelo’s Castle on the way to St Peter’s, but it paled in comparison. It’s pretty good as far as ancient forts go, but St Peter’s is one of the architectural wonders of the world.


St Peter's Square


Michelangelo's Pieta


St Angelo’s Castle

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Rome part 5

The Roman Forum is what’s left of the capital of the Roman Empire. What’s now ruins and rocks used to be the streets and buildings were Julius Caesar was killed, the Senate planned all their wars and Nero watched everything burn.

It’s a very short walk from the Colosseum. Everyone goes there. So did we, of course, but I liked the Forum better. The Colosseum was always crowded and you couldn’t really walk around and take everything in because it was just a mass of people. I guess the way it was back when they used it to kill people. The Forum was never too crowded. I got the impression that people walked by it on their way to the Colosseum and didn’t really know what it was.

You have to wait in a long line to buy a ticket to get into the Colosseum, wait in a long line to get in and pass a security check. Almost like going to a modern sports stadium. To get into the Forum, you just walk in and walk around. It’s free.

The Colosseum is impressive and it’s great to imagine all the spectacle that went on there, but for historical impact, I’ll take the Forum.


Roman Forum











Colosseum


Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Rome part 4

Trajan’s Forum is what’s left of a public square built by the Roman emperor Trajan. I don’t know much about him, but apparently he won a few wars and built a lot of stuff in Rome that’s still around, in ruin form at least.

The main part is Trajan’s Market, which was a market in the same sense that we use it. It was basically a large shopping mall with all kinds of shops, a food court and even apartments. They also had concerts. This is where the government gave people free baskets of wheat to keep everyone in line.

Trajan’s Column is a large pole dedicated to the emperor.








Monday, November 7, 2011

Rome part 3

Our hotel in Rome was very close to the Vittorio Emanuele Monument, Roman Forum and Trajan’s Forum. We passed all of them every day. The Vittorio Emanuele Monument is a very large building dedicated to the first president of Italy. It’s not nearly as old as most of the famous buildings in Rome, but it was right around the corner from out hotel.

The hotel had a dining patio on the roof with great views toward St Peter’s church. It was also very close to several excellent Italian restaurants. I love Italian food and I can never seem to find a good restaurant in Hong Kong. In Minneapolis, there’s a great pizzeria near the island, across the street from Surdyk’s, and the best little Italian deli in Victory near Crystal Lake, but I haven’t found anything in Hong Kong. Our hotel in Rome was surrounded by great food.


Traffic at Vittorio Emanuele



Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Halloween 2011

We went to a big Halloween party Monday. I didn’t even know most of the people there. At least I don’t think I knew them. It was kind of hard to tell who was whom with the costumes.

Ryan was a lazy zombie. Actually, he looked more like himself watching sports on TV than a person in a costume. Kevin was a pirate. Not as cuddly or strange as Johnny Depp, but not bad either. Lily was Lady Gaga. She had a bad wig, weird sunglasses and she wore a decorated garbage bag. It was pretty funny. I was a devil. I get to play a princess at work so I thought I’d go the other way.

There were a lot of Harry Potter and Avatar costumes and a few Lady Gagas, but Lily’s was the best. I suppose Lady Gaga is a good choice for a Halloween costume. She dresses like it’s Halloween all year.

There were too many people in the apartment where they held the party, so people spilled out into the hallways. I don’t know how the neighbors felt about that. Halloween isn’t a traditional Chinese holiday, but a lot of expats live in that building, so the locals are probably used to rowdy noise by now.

It got pretty hot even with all the doors and windows open. It may be October, but it’s nowhere close to cold in Hong Kong. Lily’s garbage bag was steaming her, so she took it off and spent half the party in her wig and underwear. That still worked out for a Lady Gaga costume. Half the girls were dressed like hookers anyway, so no one noticed.