I'm writing a new book. To make my life more complicated, I am going to do something a little different.
The story takes place over one week. There are nine main characters, a dozen supporting characters and various random extras. Rather than describe everyone's week in detail and end up with a 1500 page book, I am going to take advantage of the e-book format. Most people I know, including myself, prefer physical books to electronic files. Voracious readers, book collectors, book snobs and publishers all prefer something you can hold in your hand. I can understand the convenience of e-books, especially while traveling. Your phone can hold thousands of books. Your suitcase, not so much. But I have no intention of buying a reading device any time soon, and reading a book on my phone would drive me insane.
Publishers really hate e-books. The record industry always jumps on the latest technology. Maybe because they realized most people would augment their record collections with cassettes and 8 tracks, and then replace it all with CDs, and later replace those CDs with records. If you bought Abbey Road in four or five different formats, that was good news for EMI. But publishing is different. Any e-book is going to cost much less than a physical copy. There is less overhead for the publisher, and far less profit. A book has to be printed, shipped and stored. That costs more than copying a digital file, but it also means retailers can charge higher prices. If a printed book costs $20, the publisher might make $4, more or less. There are a million factors, but let's say their net profit is 20%. If an e-book costs 99 cents, the publisher makes just under 20 cents. If you ran a dying business, would you rather make $4 per sale or 20 cents?
All of my books are available in e-format. I have never read any of them that way, but I have never heard any complaints about formatting or font or whatever anyone might complain about. For the new book, I might have to find a way to read it digitally.
The plan is to have a normal, physical novel that tells the story of these people and their week. That will be the official book, more or less. Some of the couples, among the main characters, will also get an e-book about the week from their point of view. It will definitely not be the same scene written over and over again. Since the characters interact sporadically, each e-book will be mostly unique scenes that do not involve other main characters. If each e-book were the same thing, but from a different point of view, there would be no reason for the e-books.
This will not be a series. The e-books can be read in any order since they all happen concurrently, although reading one e-book will inevitably have spoilers for some of the others. Ideally, I would want people to read the main novel first and then all the e-books in whatever order they want. But that is not up to me. So each e-book will be a self-contained story that does not rely on anyone reading anything else.
The point of this little experiment is not to make more money. I don't have millions of fans who will buy absolutely anything I put out. No one expects each of the e-books to sell equally well. In fact, I have been told that the second release will be lucky to sell half as many copies as the first, and the numbers will plummet with each subsequent release. Everyone involved makes more money from physical books anyway.
My primary concern is to tell the story. As soon as I started writing the first draft, I knew that it would be too long for a single book. The last thing I want is a series, but I want to write everything that needs to be written. With the e-book plan, I can write everything and keep the book at a reasonable pace. It will also be a fun challenge to write from different points of view. Like witnesses to a car crash, the characters will not necessarily remember everything the same way. One e-book might contradict another, in some aspects. Some readers will probably assume that I screwed up, but I have faith that most people who read books understand the concept of an unreliable narrator. One of the e-books will be told by a vehemently reliable narrator, but I'm not going to tell anyone which one that is. Again, I have faith in readers.
I have discussed this with a few key people and no one thinks it is a stupid idea. Whether I can pull it off or not is another thing, but the idea polls well. All I have to do now is actually write the thing.
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 20, 2019
Wednesday, January 23, 2019
In the Year 2525
Bernardo Bertolucci died November 26. He was a great filmmaker, but since this blog is about me, I'm going to make his death about me. There is something unwholesome about that, but I think Bertolucci would approve. Or at least give that little smirk he used from time to time.
Bertolucci is a character in my most recent book, Acting Like Adults. He does not run from town to town solving crimes or anything as stupid. He is a very minor character. One of the protagonists is an actor who gets a part in a feature film. As soon as I decided that the fictional film would be a biography of French writer/anarchist Émile Armand, I knew that Bertolucci had to be the director. I could have just as easily created a fictional director, but this seemed like a project he might enjoy, and his reputation works in my favor. Had I created a fictional character, it would have been based on Bertolucci anyway.
Legally, you can portray a real person in your work of fiction as long as it is not libelous. Bertolucci is described in this book as a great filmmaker, so I doubt anyone would call that libel. Realistically, he was never going to know about it anyway. The only possible trouble I might have faced was in my description of his home. A recent interview with him described the interior and it was surprisingly easy to find his address. In the one in a billion chance he read the book, he might not have appreciated my attention to detail.
My only real concern was his health. He was 76, recovering from spinal surgery and confined to a wheelchair when I started writing the book. He also had cancer, but that disease is a wild card in everyone's deck. If he had died while I was writing, I would have changed him into a fictional character.
Hugh Hefner died in September 2017, long after I finished the first draft. He is not a character in the book, but two of the characters do some work related to his magazine and there is a brief mention of someone making a film about his life. Like Bertolucci, he is very much alive when this story takes place. I was kind of hoping that someone would make a movie about him just after this book came out. That has yet to happen.
They were alive when I wrote the book, as were Jerry Lewis, Jeanne Moreau, Glenne Headly, Martin Landau and Rose Marie. There was a time when I considered having the story take place in the recent past. Had I done that, it might be easier to understand that so many dead people are supposed to be alive.
In the book, one of the actor characters gets a part in a new HBO series about the Civil War called Secession. Other than what would have to be a ridiculous budget, the fictional series in the story sounds like something the real HBO would love to do. There is plenty of room for excessive violence, action and nudity. As far as American wars go, the Civil War is one of the most popular.
More than a year after I created the fictional series, HBO released a real series called Succession. It has nothing to do with the Civil War, but the title similarities put it in the predictions category. I'm no Jules Verne, but this book saw the future more than anything else I have ever written. Of course, the real HBO series was probably in development before I started writing about the fictional series, but along with the rest of the general public, I had no way of knowing about that. And their title might have changed more than a few times. Even when it was announced, I never heard about it. Most HBO shows never make it to HBO Asia. I don't think we get this one, but we have the one about the detective in 1960s Singapore that they probably don't show in America.
But my biggest unintentional prediction in Acting Like Adults is Harvey Weinstein. The lead antagonist is a respected and successful movie producer who does very bad things in private. Everything we know about Weinstein's crimes became public knowledge long after I finished the first draft. Looking at it now, anyone would assume that my fictional character is based on him. But I knew nothing about all the horrible things he did while I was writing the story. I even mentioned him by name, positively, in a previous book, Harmony On Spring Hill. One of the fictional characters in that book is described as “the Harvey Weinstein of Israel”. It was meant as a description of that character's success. Today, it sounds like I'm saying something very different that I never intended.
My fictional Weinstein character might sound like the real Weinstein in hindsight, but I actually based him on Lou Pearlman, the successful record producer who did very bad things in private. I'm not even subtle about it. The character's name is Jay Pearlman. Lou Pearlman's full name was Louis Jay Pearlman. The real Lou Pearlman was from Queens and used his cousin, Art Garfunkel, to break into record producing. The fictional Jay Pearlman is from New York and uses his family connections to break into movies. But Weinstein and his crimes are more famous, so anyone who reads this book will make the obvious assumptions. Five hundred years from now, when children are forced to read this book in school as the last surviving example of literature from the Ancient American Empire, it will be a given that the Jay Pearlman character was based on the real life monster who inspired the Winestine Laws. Those poor children will never know the truth.
Obviously, I'm joking about one of my books being read in 500 years. The only thing they will have from today is Fifty Shades of Grey and The Great Kardashian Twitters.
Bertolucci is a character in my most recent book, Acting Like Adults. He does not run from town to town solving crimes or anything as stupid. He is a very minor character. One of the protagonists is an actor who gets a part in a feature film. As soon as I decided that the fictional film would be a biography of French writer/anarchist Émile Armand, I knew that Bertolucci had to be the director. I could have just as easily created a fictional director, but this seemed like a project he might enjoy, and his reputation works in my favor. Had I created a fictional character, it would have been based on Bertolucci anyway.
Legally, you can portray a real person in your work of fiction as long as it is not libelous. Bertolucci is described in this book as a great filmmaker, so I doubt anyone would call that libel. Realistically, he was never going to know about it anyway. The only possible trouble I might have faced was in my description of his home. A recent interview with him described the interior and it was surprisingly easy to find his address. In the one in a billion chance he read the book, he might not have appreciated my attention to detail.
My only real concern was his health. He was 76, recovering from spinal surgery and confined to a wheelchair when I started writing the book. He also had cancer, but that disease is a wild card in everyone's deck. If he had died while I was writing, I would have changed him into a fictional character.
Hugh Hefner died in September 2017, long after I finished the first draft. He is not a character in the book, but two of the characters do some work related to his magazine and there is a brief mention of someone making a film about his life. Like Bertolucci, he is very much alive when this story takes place. I was kind of hoping that someone would make a movie about him just after this book came out. That has yet to happen.
They were alive when I wrote the book, as were Jerry Lewis, Jeanne Moreau, Glenne Headly, Martin Landau and Rose Marie. There was a time when I considered having the story take place in the recent past. Had I done that, it might be easier to understand that so many dead people are supposed to be alive.
In the book, one of the actor characters gets a part in a new HBO series about the Civil War called Secession. Other than what would have to be a ridiculous budget, the fictional series in the story sounds like something the real HBO would love to do. There is plenty of room for excessive violence, action and nudity. As far as American wars go, the Civil War is one of the most popular.
More than a year after I created the fictional series, HBO released a real series called Succession. It has nothing to do with the Civil War, but the title similarities put it in the predictions category. I'm no Jules Verne, but this book saw the future more than anything else I have ever written. Of course, the real HBO series was probably in development before I started writing about the fictional series, but along with the rest of the general public, I had no way of knowing about that. And their title might have changed more than a few times. Even when it was announced, I never heard about it. Most HBO shows never make it to HBO Asia. I don't think we get this one, but we have the one about the detective in 1960s Singapore that they probably don't show in America.
But my biggest unintentional prediction in Acting Like Adults is Harvey Weinstein. The lead antagonist is a respected and successful movie producer who does very bad things in private. Everything we know about Weinstein's crimes became public knowledge long after I finished the first draft. Looking at it now, anyone would assume that my fictional character is based on him. But I knew nothing about all the horrible things he did while I was writing the story. I even mentioned him by name, positively, in a previous book, Harmony On Spring Hill. One of the fictional characters in that book is described as “the Harvey Weinstein of Israel”. It was meant as a description of that character's success. Today, it sounds like I'm saying something very different that I never intended.
My fictional Weinstein character might sound like the real Weinstein in hindsight, but I actually based him on Lou Pearlman, the successful record producer who did very bad things in private. I'm not even subtle about it. The character's name is Jay Pearlman. Lou Pearlman's full name was Louis Jay Pearlman. The real Lou Pearlman was from Queens and used his cousin, Art Garfunkel, to break into record producing. The fictional Jay Pearlman is from New York and uses his family connections to break into movies. But Weinstein and his crimes are more famous, so anyone who reads this book will make the obvious assumptions. Five hundred years from now, when children are forced to read this book in school as the last surviving example of literature from the Ancient American Empire, it will be a given that the Jay Pearlman character was based on the real life monster who inspired the Winestine Laws. Those poor children will never know the truth.
Obviously, I'm joking about one of my books being read in 500 years. The only thing they will have from today is Fifty Shades of Grey and The Great Kardashian Twitters.
Tuesday, February 6, 2018
Hailey's Novel Diary – 2/6/18
Acting Like Adults comes out on Wednesday, with a full release of all formats on February 14. Everyone should buy a copy before the movie comes out and they change everything. Then, buy another copy to see all the differences. I would recommend buying multiple copies of each edition. Sometimes you lose a book or loan it out to a friend and they never give it back. Just to be safe, maybe buy a dozen or two. I have been out of work for a while.
Acting Like Adults is about a group of people in Los Angeles who follow their dreams and want to make it in the entertainment industry; movies, music, TV, theater. Most of the story is how they go about getting there. Some of the characters are more successful than others. Some have more experience. Some have less. People betray each other and their own principles. There is plenty of rivalry, competition and backstabbing. Relationships come and go. Friendships are made, strained, twisted and torn apart. All that good stuff.
Part of the story involves a Harvey Weinstein character. That is a coincidence. A coincidence with really great timing, but still a coincidence. I created the character right before the whole Weinstein thing exploded. He never crossed my mind when writing the character. I knew about some of the rumors, and was not at all surprised when everything came out, but I did not know any details when writing the character.
My Weinsteinish character is a movie producer who treats women deplorably. He could be based on any number of Hollywood power players over the years. Harry Cohn used to brag about bedding every ingénue on his payroll. Sexual harassment in corporate America is nothing new. The character only seems like Weinstein now because of current events. Had this book come out a year earlier, people would think the character was based on someone else.
I think it's a pretty good book. Obviously, I'm not an impartial observer. When you create fictional characters, it's easy to form an attachment to them that the general public might not see. But I have read the book several times and there are still parts that make me laugh, a line or two that makes me feel nostalgic and a couple of scenes that piss me off. With movies, you can have a preview and see if the audience laughs and cries in all the right places. With books, you never know how the reader feels. I hope someone out there reads it the way I do.
Saturday, February 3, 2018
Hailey's Novel Diary – 2/3/18
I have optioned my soon to be published international bestseller. That might be a little optimistic.
I have optioned my soon to be published reasonably well received novel. That also assumes too much.
I have optioned my soon to be published book. That is accurate. It is a book and it will be available soon.
The option part refers to the production company, Vast Entertainment. They have the option to put everything together to make a movie or not. The details are staggering, and require agents, lawyers and people with business degrees to hold meetings and conference calls before any legal documents are typed up and signed. From my end, it all seems far more complicated than it needs to be, but I'm sure it evolved from a century of lawsuits, misunderstandings, accusations, broken partnerships and a lot of hurt feelings.
The production company now has the option to buy the film rights. For the next six months, they can find a studio, producers, other production companies, power players with clout in the industry and/or miscellaneous financial backers to make a movie. Or they can turn around and sell the option to someone else. Or they can sit on it and do absolutely nothing. When their time is up, they can buy the rights, renew the option, renegotiate a completely different contract with me, or what happens most of the time, they can wash their hands of the whole thing. They would only renegotiate or renew if they were close to getting somewhere. Actually buying the film rights is a final step that would only happen if everything else falls into place. Buying the option simply lets them get all the right people together without worrying that someone else will buy the rights.
Somewhere along the line, they will decide what kind of movie this story should be, if they have not already done so. If they are looking at a feature, they will pitch it to studios, larger production companies and name producers. If they think it should be somewhere on TV, they will go to the networks and television producers/production companies.
A far more likely option, not to be confused with the book option, is that they will simply sell the option to someone else. This happens all the time. When you see a movie with three or more production companies in the opening credits, one of them probably bought the option from the original author and sold it to one of the other companies, who in turn might have sold it to another company or studio. Generally speaking, everyone in the actual filming of the movie/TV show only works for one production company or studio/network. Most movies today have multiple production companies attached because they need multiple financial backers, the producers/actors involved have vanity labels, and someone owns the book option that started everything.
In exchange for all that, I got a check. It was not an especially large check, but if any future movie ever enters principal photography, I get a much larger check. If a movie is released and makes a healthy profit, I get more checks based on a tiny percentage of net earnings.
People who know nothing about the motion picture industry have told me that this will make me rich. It will not. The only way this makes me a millionaire is if it gets developed and packaged and filmed and released and becomes one of the biggest box office hits of all time. That is unlikely. Most movies do not become the biggest box office hits of all time. In fact, almost all of them do not. This is not a story with planets exploding and computer animation creatures. It is about people without any power or influence trying to make their dreams come true. If it somehow became a hit, I would probably make more money from increased book sales than I ever would from the movie. My tiny piece of the pie is based on net earnings, which is nothing like the gross earnings that studios always brag about.
Before anyone can count all their piles of money, a movie actually has to be made first. That is pretty far down the road, if it even happens at all. Most options never get developed. Anyone who writes books to get rich is a fool anyway. And writing books hoping that they will become hit movies would be insane. That is like digging through garbage dumpsters to find a winning lottery ticket.
My motivation is to see what happens. The money is irrelevant. It's essentially free money. It is not entirely free since I can't sell the option to anyone else until it expires, but owning the rights is meaningless if you never sell the option. If everything progresses as everyone wants it to, I get more free money, but I mostly get to witness the process. I have seen how movies are made in front of the camera. I would love to see what goes on before the cameras roll.
I have optioned my soon to be published reasonably well received novel. That also assumes too much.
I have optioned my soon to be published book. That is accurate. It is a book and it will be available soon.
The option part refers to the production company, Vast Entertainment. They have the option to put everything together to make a movie or not. The details are staggering, and require agents, lawyers and people with business degrees to hold meetings and conference calls before any legal documents are typed up and signed. From my end, it all seems far more complicated than it needs to be, but I'm sure it evolved from a century of lawsuits, misunderstandings, accusations, broken partnerships and a lot of hurt feelings.
The production company now has the option to buy the film rights. For the next six months, they can find a studio, producers, other production companies, power players with clout in the industry and/or miscellaneous financial backers to make a movie. Or they can turn around and sell the option to someone else. Or they can sit on it and do absolutely nothing. When their time is up, they can buy the rights, renew the option, renegotiate a completely different contract with me, or what happens most of the time, they can wash their hands of the whole thing. They would only renegotiate or renew if they were close to getting somewhere. Actually buying the film rights is a final step that would only happen if everything else falls into place. Buying the option simply lets them get all the right people together without worrying that someone else will buy the rights.
Somewhere along the line, they will decide what kind of movie this story should be, if they have not already done so. If they are looking at a feature, they will pitch it to studios, larger production companies and name producers. If they think it should be somewhere on TV, they will go to the networks and television producers/production companies.
A far more likely option, not to be confused with the book option, is that they will simply sell the option to someone else. This happens all the time. When you see a movie with three or more production companies in the opening credits, one of them probably bought the option from the original author and sold it to one of the other companies, who in turn might have sold it to another company or studio. Generally speaking, everyone in the actual filming of the movie/TV show only works for one production company or studio/network. Most movies today have multiple production companies attached because they need multiple financial backers, the producers/actors involved have vanity labels, and someone owns the book option that started everything.
In exchange for all that, I got a check. It was not an especially large check, but if any future movie ever enters principal photography, I get a much larger check. If a movie is released and makes a healthy profit, I get more checks based on a tiny percentage of net earnings.
People who know nothing about the motion picture industry have told me that this will make me rich. It will not. The only way this makes me a millionaire is if it gets developed and packaged and filmed and released and becomes one of the biggest box office hits of all time. That is unlikely. Most movies do not become the biggest box office hits of all time. In fact, almost all of them do not. This is not a story with planets exploding and computer animation creatures. It is about people without any power or influence trying to make their dreams come true. If it somehow became a hit, I would probably make more money from increased book sales than I ever would from the movie. My tiny piece of the pie is based on net earnings, which is nothing like the gross earnings that studios always brag about.
Before anyone can count all their piles of money, a movie actually has to be made first. That is pretty far down the road, if it even happens at all. Most options never get developed. Anyone who writes books to get rich is a fool anyway. And writing books hoping that they will become hit movies would be insane. That is like digging through garbage dumpsters to find a winning lottery ticket.
My motivation is to see what happens. The money is irrelevant. It's essentially free money. It is not entirely free since I can't sell the option to anyone else until it expires, but owning the rights is meaningless if you never sell the option. If everything progresses as everyone wants it to, I get more free money, but I mostly get to witness the process. I have seen how movies are made in front of the camera. I would love to see what goes on before the cameras roll.
Wednesday, January 3, 2018
Hailey's Novel Diary – 1/3/18
What kind of movie could someone make from my book? The options are basically feature film, movie of the week or TV series. Everyone wants their book to be a feature, but those are the most expensive to make and studios only put out so many each year. Movies of the week are cheaper, faster and far less glamorous. I don't think you should ever write a book hoping it becomes a movie, but I doubt anyone writes while dreaming of a movie of the week. A TV series is better suited to epic sagas, especially in the fantasy or young adult genres. My single book is about adults in the present who never go to a supernatural war or encounter magical creatures. It takes place over a relatively short period of time and could never be stretched out over six TV seasons.
With the Weinstein connection, this book could easily be a movie of the week. That could get it out to the public before everyone forgets about him. My personal opinion is that a feature film would be a much better choice, but I assume that is everyone's opinion. Once you sell the film rights, other people make those decisions. They could make an Oscar winning feature that changes the course of humanity forever or a single episode of a Lifetime series that will be canceled next week. Nothing is up to me.
Once someone who is not me decides how to film it, they need to get a cast and crew. Who would direct it? I have no idea. The budget would determine the director, and sometimes the director would determine the budget. If the story is sold to A&E as an episode of one of their series, we can assume that Martin Scorsese will not be directing. Most of the main characters are women, so he would not be involved anyway. On the other hand, if the Coen brothers or PT Anderson got involved, it would automatically be a feature. Realistically, it would most likely be someone I have never heard of, no matter how it gets categorized.
If I could pick my ideal cast, it would be Katharine Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor, Audrey Hepburn, Paul Newman, Ingrid Bergman (or Grace Kelly – I'm flexible), Van Johnson, Henry Fonda, Paulette Goddard, Joan Bennett, Agnes Moorehead and Bette Davis, with Orson Welles or Broderick Crawford as the Weinstein character. I'm pretty sure none of them are available, and no studio would want to pay for all of those names, but they could all play the parts beautifully. I would go see that movie no matter what it was about.
As far as actors who are alive and working today, I have no idea. None of the characters were written with any actors in mind, living or dead. One of the characters bases one of her performances on Katharine Hepburn, but I never thought in a million years that Katharine Hepburn would play that character. For obvious reasons. Most of the leads are in their 20s-30s. Today's younger actors do computer animated comic book movies that I have never seen. This is one of many instances where it's a good thing that I would not be in charge. Working professionals more qualified than I should make those decisions.
With the Weinstein connection, this book could easily be a movie of the week. That could get it out to the public before everyone forgets about him. My personal opinion is that a feature film would be a much better choice, but I assume that is everyone's opinion. Once you sell the film rights, other people make those decisions. They could make an Oscar winning feature that changes the course of humanity forever or a single episode of a Lifetime series that will be canceled next week. Nothing is up to me.
Once someone who is not me decides how to film it, they need to get a cast and crew. Who would direct it? I have no idea. The budget would determine the director, and sometimes the director would determine the budget. If the story is sold to A&E as an episode of one of their series, we can assume that Martin Scorsese will not be directing. Most of the main characters are women, so he would not be involved anyway. On the other hand, if the Coen brothers or PT Anderson got involved, it would automatically be a feature. Realistically, it would most likely be someone I have never heard of, no matter how it gets categorized.
If I could pick my ideal cast, it would be Katharine Hepburn, Elizabeth Taylor, Audrey Hepburn, Paul Newman, Ingrid Bergman (or Grace Kelly – I'm flexible), Van Johnson, Henry Fonda, Paulette Goddard, Joan Bennett, Agnes Moorehead and Bette Davis, with Orson Welles or Broderick Crawford as the Weinstein character. I'm pretty sure none of them are available, and no studio would want to pay for all of those names, but they could all play the parts beautifully. I would go see that movie no matter what it was about.
As far as actors who are alive and working today, I have no idea. None of the characters were written with any actors in mind, living or dead. One of the characters bases one of her performances on Katharine Hepburn, but I never thought in a million years that Katharine Hepburn would play that character. For obvious reasons. Most of the leads are in their 20s-30s. Today's younger actors do computer animated comic book movies that I have never seen. This is one of many instances where it's a good thing that I would not be in charge. Working professionals more qualified than I should make those decisions.
Saturday, December 30, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/30/17
The final draft is finished. I have read it through, cover to cover, and I think it might be the final draft. I have to let other people read it before I know. Sooner or later, you reach a point where more rewrites are too much and it is all editing. It would be easy to keep writing until the hundredth draft. But that would be a mistake.
The next step is getting it published. That could take weeks, months or even years. There is no time limit with publishers, unless you are on their deadline. Then it better be finished on time. When you wait for them, they can take as long as they want. We all wait for them and jump through their hoops because the alternative is rejection. I would rather have to wait until 2020 for this book to get out in the public than for no one to ever read it at all. Ideally, 2018 would be better. I almost made it in time for 2017, but I took too much time off. At least I started and finished in the same year.
Several things can happen at this point. The most likely is that they tell me to go back and fix this chapter or that character. If/when they have notes, they will be specific. I fully expect notes about the length and/or ending. If it is too long, I have no idea what to cut out. I will have to read it through again and figure out what can go. If they want a different ending, I will have to stand my ground. I love the ending. Maybe there is a better way to end it. I'm sure a great writer could think of several different options. But I want it to end as written.
A worse option is complete and utter rejection. “This is not what we are looking for at this time.” Shopping around is not something I feel like doing right now. But I have an ace in the hole. Hollywood is sniffing around for the film rights. The odds of a movie actually getting made are extremely unlikely. I'm no bookie, but I would put it at 18,462 to 1, but movie adaptations almost guarantee book sales. Publishers are willing to take that risk.
The downside to optioning the book is that someone is almost guaranteed to want me to change the ending. It is not a Hollywood ending. The bad guys are not always punished for their bad deeds. The good guys do not always get a satisfying resolution. My ending is more realistic than a summer blockbuster. The ending of Pretty Woman is absurd, but it was a huge hit. The ending of Barton Fink is perfect, but it bombed. Studios, the public, filmmakers and authors never all seem to want the same thing.
The next step is getting it published. That could take weeks, months or even years. There is no time limit with publishers, unless you are on their deadline. Then it better be finished on time. When you wait for them, they can take as long as they want. We all wait for them and jump through their hoops because the alternative is rejection. I would rather have to wait until 2020 for this book to get out in the public than for no one to ever read it at all. Ideally, 2018 would be better. I almost made it in time for 2017, but I took too much time off. At least I started and finished in the same year.
Several things can happen at this point. The most likely is that they tell me to go back and fix this chapter or that character. If/when they have notes, they will be specific. I fully expect notes about the length and/or ending. If it is too long, I have no idea what to cut out. I will have to read it through again and figure out what can go. If they want a different ending, I will have to stand my ground. I love the ending. Maybe there is a better way to end it. I'm sure a great writer could think of several different options. But I want it to end as written.
A worse option is complete and utter rejection. “This is not what we are looking for at this time.” Shopping around is not something I feel like doing right now. But I have an ace in the hole. Hollywood is sniffing around for the film rights. The odds of a movie actually getting made are extremely unlikely. I'm no bookie, but I would put it at 18,462 to 1, but movie adaptations almost guarantee book sales. Publishers are willing to take that risk.
The downside to optioning the book is that someone is almost guaranteed to want me to change the ending. It is not a Hollywood ending. The bad guys are not always punished for their bad deeds. The good guys do not always get a satisfying resolution. My ending is more realistic than a summer blockbuster. The ending of Pretty Woman is absurd, but it was a huge hit. The ending of Barton Fink is perfect, but it bombed. Studios, the public, filmmakers and authors never all seem to want the same thing.
Friday, December 29, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/29/17
How long does it take to walk from one place to another? This is where knowing the place you are writing about comes in handy.
This story takes place mostly in Los Angeles. I have been there, but I'm far from an expert. I have relied heavily on Google maps to tell me which neighborhoods are where and what streets go from here to there. I mention how Sunset Boulevard starts winding at Hamburger Hamlet and changes abruptly at the border between Beverly Hills and West Hollywood, how it twists and turns like crazy near Will Rogers State Park and suddenly ends at PCH. One of the characters talks about Gil Turner's on Sunset and Doheny. There is a fair amount of detail about Sunset Boulevard in the book. I don't think I have ever set foot on Sunset Boulevard.
But when it comes to travel times, Google is useless. They have their maps with driving directions, but those are questionable. And some of their routes are ridiculous. Their estimated walking times for Hong Kong seem to ignore all traffic and construction. I'm sure their driving estimates are just as bad. If they don't take traffic into consideration, what's the point? A city like Hong Kong will always have traffic and construction.
One of the characters walks from Stoney Point to an apartment in Chatsworth. How long would that take? I don't know. I'm going to say 30 minutes. A running joke in this story is that it takes 30 minutes to drive to even the nearest places in Los Angeles, so I might as well make walking take 30 minutes as well.
45 minutes from the Peak Tram?
Uphill?
In 90% humidity?
Good luck with that.
This story takes place mostly in Los Angeles. I have been there, but I'm far from an expert. I have relied heavily on Google maps to tell me which neighborhoods are where and what streets go from here to there. I mention how Sunset Boulevard starts winding at Hamburger Hamlet and changes abruptly at the border between Beverly Hills and West Hollywood, how it twists and turns like crazy near Will Rogers State Park and suddenly ends at PCH. One of the characters talks about Gil Turner's on Sunset and Doheny. There is a fair amount of detail about Sunset Boulevard in the book. I don't think I have ever set foot on Sunset Boulevard.
But when it comes to travel times, Google is useless. They have their maps with driving directions, but those are questionable. And some of their routes are ridiculous. Their estimated walking times for Hong Kong seem to ignore all traffic and construction. I'm sure their driving estimates are just as bad. If they don't take traffic into consideration, what's the point? A city like Hong Kong will always have traffic and construction.
One of the characters walks from Stoney Point to an apartment in Chatsworth. How long would that take? I don't know. I'm going to say 30 minutes. A running joke in this story is that it takes 30 minutes to drive to even the nearest places in Los Angeles, so I might as well make walking take 30 minutes as well.
Uphill?
In 90% humidity?
Good luck with that.
Thursday, December 28, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/28/17
I'm really trying to keep this book under 100,000 words. It's not easy. I am somewhere around 120,000 right now. That might sound like I'm far above my own self-imposed limit, but at this stage in editing, a paragraph can easily turn into a sentence. There is always more subtracting than adding in the final drafts.
Does this book need to be under 100,000 words? No. I'm not contractually obligated to deliver a lower word count, and the movie thing is not really a consideration at this point. But I know how this game is played. The longer it is, the more likely someone somewhere will demand that I shorten it. The last thing I want to do when I think I'm finished is to go back and finish it even more, especially weeks or months after I have stopped thinking about the story and moved on to something else. I realize that is part of the job, but it is my least favorite part. It's much easier to make those changes during the editing phase.
Selling the film rights does not really make any difference to how I'm writing. If there were already actors and a director attached, they would probably all have opinions about everything. Can this character do that instead. This character needs to be more like Actress A. But at this stage, there is only a minor production company involved, and they have nothing to do with the story. The final draft will be finished before anyone can tell me everything they hate about it.
If I bring it in under 100,000 words, which is anyone's guess at this point, and if I sell the film rights, which could still fall through, and if a movie actually gets made, which is unlikely no matter who owns the rights, the book will be on shelves long before anyone tells me how I should have rewritten the story. I can see the appeal, from the filmmakers' point of view, to having a say in how the original source material is written. But if they want to do that, they should call me while I'm writing the first few drafts.
Does this book need to be under 100,000 words? No. I'm not contractually obligated to deliver a lower word count, and the movie thing is not really a consideration at this point. But I know how this game is played. The longer it is, the more likely someone somewhere will demand that I shorten it. The last thing I want to do when I think I'm finished is to go back and finish it even more, especially weeks or months after I have stopped thinking about the story and moved on to something else. I realize that is part of the job, but it is my least favorite part. It's much easier to make those changes during the editing phase.
Selling the film rights does not really make any difference to how I'm writing. If there were already actors and a director attached, they would probably all have opinions about everything. Can this character do that instead. This character needs to be more like Actress A. But at this stage, there is only a minor production company involved, and they have nothing to do with the story. The final draft will be finished before anyone can tell me everything they hate about it.
If I bring it in under 100,000 words, which is anyone's guess at this point, and if I sell the film rights, which could still fall through, and if a movie actually gets made, which is unlikely no matter who owns the rights, the book will be on shelves long before anyone tells me how I should have rewritten the story. I can see the appeal, from the filmmakers' point of view, to having a say in how the original source material is written. But if they want to do that, they should call me while I'm writing the first few drafts.
Saturday, December 23, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/23/17
I have a few conflicting opinions about selling the rights to my book. I like watching movies, as long as it is not computer animation of computer monsters or computer superheroes saving the CGI day. This book has nothing like that, unless they completely World War Z it and change everything except the title.
I would absolutely love to play a part as one of the characters in a movie based on a book that I wrote. How cool would that be? But that is never going to happen. From what I know about studios and book adaptations, they want the original author as far away from the set as possible. The fact that I live in Hong Kong is probably a plus to any producer. I don't know which character I would play even if I could. I don't physically match any of the leads, and studios want names in those parts anyway. At most, I would be Woman in Restaurant #3.
I would have no say in casting. I could make a wish list of who I would want to play each character, but that list would have nothing to do with which actors are available, which agencies represent everyone and which personalities cannot work together. My list would be thrown in the trash before a casting director was even hired. Probably for good reason. I have no idea who the most bankable actors are these days and who the studio executives prefer. My choices would be about who could play the part, not about who could make the most money. I don't know the first thing about being a producer.
Once you sell the film rights, you have no control over anything. They can change the characters into different people. They can change the setting away from Los Angeles. They can rearrange the story so that everything happens backward, cut out the most important scenes or make it unrecognizable. Forrest Gump in the book is a completely different character than in the movie. The author of the original MASH book was politically conservative while the movie and TV series were far more liberal. Ernest Hemingway had all kinds of negative things to say about movie adaptations, and JD Salinger hated the process so much that he never allowed anyone to film Catcher in the Rye.
JD Salinger was a great writer, but I have never wanted to emulate him or his career. I grew up on movies and still have faith that they can be more than computer cartoons. My point of view is that a movie and book are entirely different animals. A book is written by one person in isolation, more or less. A movie is made by dozens or hundreds of people with their own agendas and lists of notes, ideas, ultimatums, compromises and demands. Movies cannot be completely faithful to the book. Time and money are different in both worlds. A book about two people talking over coffee costs as much to publish as a detailed history of the universe. Movie budgets can vary by hundreds of millions of dollars. Higher expenses also mean that movies are more dependent on commercial popularity. A book can lose money, break even, be a modest success, be a bestseller or be the next big thing. Today, a movie is either a blockbuster or a flop.
Even the best adaptations cut something out of the book. They have to. This usually annoys the author, but definitely does not make them bad movies. If authors always got their way, some great movies would have never been made.
Jack Nicholson's performance in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest is brilliant, but Ken Kesey wanted the story told from Chief Bromden's point of view. Truman Capote did not want Audrey Hepburn to play Holly Golightly. PL Travers did not want Julie Andrews to play Mary Poppins, and hated the movie so much, they made a movie about it. Both Stephen King and Anthony Burgess thought that Stanley Kubrick did not understand their novels. Maybe they don't understand his films. Or maybe they can't separate the stories in their minds with the interpretations on screen. Although you would think Stephen King has enough experience with that. He can't hate The Shining more than Maximum Overdrive.
The African Queen, Gone With the Wind, Howard's End, To Kill a Mockingbird, A Clockwork Orange, Sophie's Choice, Terms of Endearment, The Bridge On the River Kwai, No Country For Old Men, Psycho. The list of great movies made from books without the author's involvement is practically endless. Sometimes the original novels are great. Sometimes, they are less than great. A movie is someone else's vision, not the original author's. If you want the author's vision, read the book.
If all of the stars align and my book somehow gets filmed, I would love it to become a masterpiece by someone like Stanley Kubrick, even if he interpreted it in a completely different way. Obviously, he is not available anymore. This was not his type of story anyway. But that brings up another reason I could never be a producer. I can't think of a single director for this story. I would want one of the best of the best, and hopefully living, like Terrence Malick, but this is not his type of story either. I'm sure there are any number of wonderful directors who would fit perfectly. I just don't know who they are.
But even a piece of crap movie that gets destroyed by the critics and heckled by audiences is still ok. Maybe less for the studio. Just going through the process would be an interesting experience for me. A bad movie never hurts the book, but a good movie only makes more people go out and read it. I really have nothing to lose.
I would absolutely love to play a part as one of the characters in a movie based on a book that I wrote. How cool would that be? But that is never going to happen. From what I know about studios and book adaptations, they want the original author as far away from the set as possible. The fact that I live in Hong Kong is probably a plus to any producer. I don't know which character I would play even if I could. I don't physically match any of the leads, and studios want names in those parts anyway. At most, I would be Woman in Restaurant #3.
I would have no say in casting. I could make a wish list of who I would want to play each character, but that list would have nothing to do with which actors are available, which agencies represent everyone and which personalities cannot work together. My list would be thrown in the trash before a casting director was even hired. Probably for good reason. I have no idea who the most bankable actors are these days and who the studio executives prefer. My choices would be about who could play the part, not about who could make the most money. I don't know the first thing about being a producer.
Once you sell the film rights, you have no control over anything. They can change the characters into different people. They can change the setting away from Los Angeles. They can rearrange the story so that everything happens backward, cut out the most important scenes or make it unrecognizable. Forrest Gump in the book is a completely different character than in the movie. The author of the original MASH book was politically conservative while the movie and TV series were far more liberal. Ernest Hemingway had all kinds of negative things to say about movie adaptations, and JD Salinger hated the process so much that he never allowed anyone to film Catcher in the Rye.
JD Salinger was a great writer, but I have never wanted to emulate him or his career. I grew up on movies and still have faith that they can be more than computer cartoons. My point of view is that a movie and book are entirely different animals. A book is written by one person in isolation, more or less. A movie is made by dozens or hundreds of people with their own agendas and lists of notes, ideas, ultimatums, compromises and demands. Movies cannot be completely faithful to the book. Time and money are different in both worlds. A book about two people talking over coffee costs as much to publish as a detailed history of the universe. Movie budgets can vary by hundreds of millions of dollars. Higher expenses also mean that movies are more dependent on commercial popularity. A book can lose money, break even, be a modest success, be a bestseller or be the next big thing. Today, a movie is either a blockbuster or a flop.
Even the best adaptations cut something out of the book. They have to. This usually annoys the author, but definitely does not make them bad movies. If authors always got their way, some great movies would have never been made.
Jack Nicholson's performance in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest is brilliant, but Ken Kesey wanted the story told from Chief Bromden's point of view. Truman Capote did not want Audrey Hepburn to play Holly Golightly. PL Travers did not want Julie Andrews to play Mary Poppins, and hated the movie so much, they made a movie about it. Both Stephen King and Anthony Burgess thought that Stanley Kubrick did not understand their novels. Maybe they don't understand his films. Or maybe they can't separate the stories in their minds with the interpretations on screen. Although you would think Stephen King has enough experience with that. He can't hate The Shining more than Maximum Overdrive.
The African Queen, Gone With the Wind, Howard's End, To Kill a Mockingbird, A Clockwork Orange, Sophie's Choice, Terms of Endearment, The Bridge On the River Kwai, No Country For Old Men, Psycho. The list of great movies made from books without the author's involvement is practically endless. Sometimes the original novels are great. Sometimes, they are less than great. A movie is someone else's vision, not the original author's. If you want the author's vision, read the book.
If all of the stars align and my book somehow gets filmed, I would love it to become a masterpiece by someone like Stanley Kubrick, even if he interpreted it in a completely different way. Obviously, he is not available anymore. This was not his type of story anyway. But that brings up another reason I could never be a producer. I can't think of a single director for this story. I would want one of the best of the best, and hopefully living, like Terrence Malick, but this is not his type of story either. I'm sure there are any number of wonderful directors who would fit perfectly. I just don't know who they are.
But even a piece of crap movie that gets destroyed by the critics and heckled by audiences is still ok. Maybe less for the studio. Just going through the process would be an interesting experience for me. A bad movie never hurts the book, but a good movie only makes more people go out and read it. I really have nothing to lose.
Friday, December 22, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/22/17
Have you ever written a book that was turned into a movie? Neither have I. Have you ever been contacted by a production company that wanted to turn your book into a movie? I have now. That was a strange day.
I got a call from my agent asking me if I would be willing to option the book I'm writing right now. It is not even finished yet, but a production company wants to talk turkey. I don't know if I'm allowed to mention the name of the production company. I have not signed any contracts yet, so there are no non-disclosure agreements. I'm not legally bound to do or not do anything. Sometimes they want to shout about everything from the rooftops and get as much publicity as possible. Sometimes they want to keep everything top secret until the release date. I don't know where these people stand at this point.
I did some online research. They are a legitimate company that seems to specialize in book adaptations, but not one of the big movers and shakers. The producer whose name I was given has an IMDb page. It is not long, but it's not Joe Smith of Scam Productions either.
I never really thought about it before, but this book probably could work as a movie. It takes place in Los Angeles and the movie industry is involved. Hollywood loves making movies about Hollywood. There is also the Harvey Weinstein factor, which is most likely the only reason any of this is happening.
One of the characters is essentially Harvey Weinstein. Or, legally, I should say one of the fictional characters is similar in his actions and motivation. That was never my intention. I started writing this book months before the whole Weinstein thing exploded. Obviously, he was committing all of his crimes, allegedly, long before I started writing this book, but I never knew about any of it. The Weinsteinish character is simply my interpretation of a sleazy movie producer who uses his power over the careers of young women in ways that have been around long before any of us were born. My “entirely fictional” character is named after a completely different scumbag producer who is dead and cannot sue me.
The Weinstein coincidence would be great if the book were in stores right now. But he will stop being front page news long before the book comes out and years before any possible movie can ever be made. I also wrote about Hugh Hefner before he died. He is not a character by any definition, and only briefly metioned, but it would not matter even if he was. His death is already old news. After Weinstein, there was a long stream of powerful men treating women like property. Time Magazine even made some of the women who spoke out against sexual predators as their person of the year. I had no idea any of this was going to happen, but I wrote a book about what is going on right now.
Unfortunately, it will all blow over. Weak men have been afraid of strong women since the beginning of time. Powerful men have always used and abused people they think are beneath them. This is nothing new and not something that is about to go away any time soon. Sooner or later, everyone will be talking about the next big thing and sexual predation will go back into the closet.
But for the time being, someone wants to turn this book into a movie. Will that affect how I finish writing it? I hope not. Will that affect how much money I make? Probably not. I'm in no position to make any financial demands. And with Hollywood contracts, maybe they can find a way for me to owe them money. But I'm talking to them and they are talking to me. Let's see what happens.
I got a call from my agent asking me if I would be willing to option the book I'm writing right now. It is not even finished yet, but a production company wants to talk turkey. I don't know if I'm allowed to mention the name of the production company. I have not signed any contracts yet, so there are no non-disclosure agreements. I'm not legally bound to do or not do anything. Sometimes they want to shout about everything from the rooftops and get as much publicity as possible. Sometimes they want to keep everything top secret until the release date. I don't know where these people stand at this point.
I did some online research. They are a legitimate company that seems to specialize in book adaptations, but not one of the big movers and shakers. The producer whose name I was given has an IMDb page. It is not long, but it's not Joe Smith of Scam Productions either.
I never really thought about it before, but this book probably could work as a movie. It takes place in Los Angeles and the movie industry is involved. Hollywood loves making movies about Hollywood. There is also the Harvey Weinstein factor, which is most likely the only reason any of this is happening.
One of the characters is essentially Harvey Weinstein. Or, legally, I should say one of the fictional characters is similar in his actions and motivation. That was never my intention. I started writing this book months before the whole Weinstein thing exploded. Obviously, he was committing all of his crimes, allegedly, long before I started writing this book, but I never knew about any of it. The Weinsteinish character is simply my interpretation of a sleazy movie producer who uses his power over the careers of young women in ways that have been around long before any of us were born. My “entirely fictional” character is named after a completely different scumbag producer who is dead and cannot sue me.
The Weinstein coincidence would be great if the book were in stores right now. But he will stop being front page news long before the book comes out and years before any possible movie can ever be made. I also wrote about Hugh Hefner before he died. He is not a character by any definition, and only briefly metioned, but it would not matter even if he was. His death is already old news. After Weinstein, there was a long stream of powerful men treating women like property. Time Magazine even made some of the women who spoke out against sexual predators as their person of the year. I had no idea any of this was going to happen, but I wrote a book about what is going on right now.
Unfortunately, it will all blow over. Weak men have been afraid of strong women since the beginning of time. Powerful men have always used and abused people they think are beneath them. This is nothing new and not something that is about to go away any time soon. Sooner or later, everyone will be talking about the next big thing and sexual predation will go back into the closet.
But for the time being, someone wants to turn this book into a movie. Will that affect how I finish writing it? I hope not. Will that affect how much money I make? Probably not. I'm in no position to make any financial demands. And with Hollywood contracts, maybe they can find a way for me to owe them money. But I'm talking to them and they are talking to me. Let's see what happens.
Wednesday, December 20, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/20/17
While rewriting some of the dialogue in chapter 14, I gave myself a hearty laugh. That is always a good sign.
I don't write comedy, but in general, there is usually at least one line per book that makes me laugh out loud. Hopefully, anyone who shares my sense of humor will feel the same way. Some people might not think anything is funny. That would be a shame. It's important to find humor in the little things, especially when the world around you is going insane.
On the other hand, some people might think I mostly write comedy, and laugh at all kinds of serious places. That is not so bad. Laughing when it's not supposed to be funny is a lot better than not laughing when it is.
I don't write comedy, but in general, there is usually at least one line per book that makes me laugh out loud. Hopefully, anyone who shares my sense of humor will feel the same way. Some people might not think anything is funny. That would be a shame. It's important to find humor in the little things, especially when the world around you is going insane.
On the other hand, some people might think I mostly write comedy, and laugh at all kinds of serious places. That is not so bad. Laughing when it's not supposed to be funny is a lot better than not laughing when it is.
Tuesday, December 19, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/19/17
Chapter 10 is now chapter 9 and less graphic than before. It did not need to be graphic. In fact, it works better if everything is described clinically. It's supposed to be as arousing as a colonoscopy.
I have gotten in trouble with adult themes before. That is kind of ironic when you think about how uptight and vanilla I am in real life. I had to rewrite parts of Nudist Cruise because the publisher I was dealing with at the time thought it was an erotic novel, and that was a genre they did not cover. That one is kind of a long story, but the main issue was that, like a lot of people, they could not see the difference between nudists doing their thing and swingers at an orgy. There was never anything swinger or orgy about Nudist Cruise, but I had to tone down the minuscule hint of sexuality that was in there. Now, it is as innocent as a puppy. But it's still considered a “sensitive” topic because some of the people are nudists.
In this story, which is not about nudists or swingers, I'm describing anything that can be even remotely considered sexual in two different ways. It is either clinical and sterile or vulgar and flamboyant, depending on the situation. Ideally, readers will see the difference and understand why. If you find details of Harvey Weinstein's crimes arousing, you might not get it. If you find him and his actions appalling, you will.
Chapter 10, formerly chapter 11, is now much shorter. It kind of dragged on and on, so I cut it down from a long, poetic soliloquy to just stating the facts.
In some circles, there is a rule that you should not use adverbs. That is completely, utterly, absolutely, downright wrong. Adverbs are good. Verbs love adverbs. They can also modify adjectives and nouns. They are pretty versatile little guys.
But chapter 10 was too flowery. Sometimes you just have to get down to the heart of the matter. But my will gets weak and my thoughts seem to scatter. And sometimes Don Henley is in the news.
The Eagles will most likely never come back to Hong Kong, but I saw them in 2011, without Don Felder, and they were fantastic. I will never get to see them with both Frey and Felder, but they put on a great show.
I have gotten in trouble with adult themes before. That is kind of ironic when you think about how uptight and vanilla I am in real life. I had to rewrite parts of Nudist Cruise because the publisher I was dealing with at the time thought it was an erotic novel, and that was a genre they did not cover. That one is kind of a long story, but the main issue was that, like a lot of people, they could not see the difference between nudists doing their thing and swingers at an orgy. There was never anything swinger or orgy about Nudist Cruise, but I had to tone down the minuscule hint of sexuality that was in there. Now, it is as innocent as a puppy. But it's still considered a “sensitive” topic because some of the people are nudists.
In this story, which is not about nudists or swingers, I'm describing anything that can be even remotely considered sexual in two different ways. It is either clinical and sterile or vulgar and flamboyant, depending on the situation. Ideally, readers will see the difference and understand why. If you find details of Harvey Weinstein's crimes arousing, you might not get it. If you find him and his actions appalling, you will.
Chapter 10, formerly chapter 11, is now much shorter. It kind of dragged on and on, so I cut it down from a long, poetic soliloquy to just stating the facts.
In some circles, there is a rule that you should not use adverbs. That is completely, utterly, absolutely, downright wrong. Adverbs are good. Verbs love adverbs. They can also modify adjectives and nouns. They are pretty versatile little guys.
But chapter 10 was too flowery. Sometimes you just have to get down to the heart of the matter. But my will gets weak and my thoughts seem to scatter. And sometimes Don Henley is in the news.
The Eagles will most likely never come back to Hong Kong, but I saw them in 2011, without Don Felder, and they were fantastic. I will never get to see them with both Frey and Felder, but they put on a great show.
Monday, December 18, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/18/17
Chapter 9 is now part of chapter 8. When I read chapter 9, something was not right. I always knew it, but saved fixing it for a later day. I was actually looking forward to rewriting the entire chapter. At least that would tell me that I'm actually doing something.
But then I looked at chapter 8 and realized that chapter 9 was just the epilogue of the chapter, more or less. Rather than rewrite 9, I added it to 8. I'm a little disappointed that it was such an easy solution, but after reading the new extended chapter 8, it works much better.
While going through chapter 10, I realized that I skipped an important detail that almost no one will ever care about.
One of the characters is wearing clothes from the late 1920s, but I never gave any information about the dress. It is not an integral part of the story, but if I don't mention any specifics, most people are going to picture a flapper dress. But that is not what I'm thinking about at all.
In the revised version, I barely describe anything. It is just part of a sentence in passing. But I think it's enough to work.
House of Paquin evening dress
This is not the same
But then I looked at chapter 8 and realized that chapter 9 was just the epilogue of the chapter, more or less. Rather than rewrite 9, I added it to 8. I'm a little disappointed that it was such an easy solution, but after reading the new extended chapter 8, it works much better.
While going through chapter 10, I realized that I skipped an important detail that almost no one will ever care about.
One of the characters is wearing clothes from the late 1920s, but I never gave any information about the dress. It is not an integral part of the story, but if I don't mention any specifics, most people are going to picture a flapper dress. But that is not what I'm thinking about at all.
In the revised version, I barely describe anything. It is just part of a sentence in passing. But I think it's enough to work.
Thursday, December 14, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/14/17
I made a few minor changes to chapters 6 and 7. I'm a little worried that I'm not changing all that much from the last draft. I have changed some dialogue, so that's something, but you are supposed to rewrite a lot from each draft. That is what all the self-appointed experts say, at least.
And it makes sense. The first draft is never going to be as good as the final draft. That is just common sense. If your first draft is good enough to be a final draft, then you are a literary savant. It is far more likely that you only think it's good enough. Ask any publisher how many delusional writers are out there. I'm no publisher or editor, but people have given me a few books to read that were obviously first drafts. If I could tell right away, you know the professionals with years of experience can tell. I suppose that helps them decide which submissions to dump in the trash.
Since I'm barely changing anything, I can only assume that I'm missing something. Maybe I need to take a step back and think it over.
And it makes sense. The first draft is never going to be as good as the final draft. That is just common sense. If your first draft is good enough to be a final draft, then you are a literary savant. It is far more likely that you only think it's good enough. Ask any publisher how many delusional writers are out there. I'm no publisher or editor, but people have given me a few books to read that were obviously first drafts. If I could tell right away, you know the professionals with years of experience can tell. I suppose that helps them decide which submissions to dump in the trash.
Since I'm barely changing anything, I can only assume that I'm missing something. Maybe I need to take a step back and think it over.
Wednesday, December 13, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/13/17
I rewrote the big Gettysburg scene. Not because of any historical accuracy issues. I think I'm covered. At least as much as I need to be in a story that is not even remotely about the Civil War. It's what the characters do that I have rewritten. The first drafts made the point that I wanted to make, but now it sounds more amusing to me.
I had a small group of people that I never named in chapter 5. They were only in one scene and I knew I was never going to bring them back, so I never bothered to name them.
Now I have given them all names. Since they are mostly women, and we are never going to see them again, I have given them all names that are euphemisms for vagina in each character's respective culture.
Is that sexist of me? I don't think so. Would it be sexist if a man did it? I don't think I would notice. I would just assume the male author was unfamiliar with Chinese and picked the Chinese name because he liked the way it sounded rather than what it meant. Unless he was Chinese himself. Then I would wonder why he called her that.
The other names are European, so I'm sure more people will see it. If not, that's ok, too. They are not important characters.
I had a small group of people that I never named in chapter 5. They were only in one scene and I knew I was never going to bring them back, so I never bothered to name them.
Now I have given them all names. Since they are mostly women, and we are never going to see them again, I have given them all names that are euphemisms for vagina in each character's respective culture.
Is that sexist of me? I don't think so. Would it be sexist if a man did it? I don't think I would notice. I would just assume the male author was unfamiliar with Chinese and picked the Chinese name because he liked the way it sounded rather than what it meant. Unless he was Chinese himself. Then I would wonder why he called her that.
The other names are European, so I'm sure more people will see it. If not, that's ok, too. They are not important characters.
Tuesday, December 12, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/12/17
It might be a few generations before computers are ready to replace a human proofreader.
I typed the word “snigger”. Apparently, I have never done that before. At least not on this version of Word.
“I'd never do that,” he sniggered.
Makes sense to me. Spell check wanted me to change “snigger” to a much worse word with a very different meaning.
I generally ignore any and all spell check programs. That might be dangerous. No one types every wrod properly every time. But typos should reveal themselves during the editing stage. And if I mix up homophones, spell check will never notice. “He new he wanted to where his Christmas Satan hat too make his skin Les pail.” None of those words are spelled incorrectly. There is not a single squiggly red line.
So Microsoft developed their own grammar check. It is terrible. Just for fun, I ran a grammar check on the book. It wants me to change “is this a miniseries?” to “is these a miniseries?” I don't want to change that. Some differences are a matter of opinion, but this one is just wrong. It also wants me to change “is this a different battle?” to “is these a different battle?” Come on. That's just illiterate. Maybe you can argue that since “miniseries” ends in S, grammar check thinks it is plural, but “battle” is singular. Even so, it thinks “is these a ...” is correct. Is these a? Be these a? No blue lines.
Most of the spelling “errors” are proper nouns that Microsoft has never heard about. I had to add “Angeles” to the dictionary because it kept underlining Los Angeles. I would never expect them to know every city in the world, but is Los Angeles an obscure little village?
Sometimes, the spelling suggestions are just crazy. It wants me to change “campout” to “cam pout”. Compound words can be a matter of opinion, but then why not suggest “camp out”?
One of the flight attendants quietly approached Alicia during the pre-flight safety video.
The top spelling corrections are “per-flight”, “ore-flight” and “pee-flight”. Pee-flight? What kind of book does Microsoft think I'm writing? And what is an ore-flight? This is not a book about miners.
“Are you trying to sniff out if I'm a lesbo?”
Lesbo is slang, so I can understand it not being in the dictionary, but the options are “boules”, “bootless” and “boneless”. Who accidentally types “lesbo” when trying to type “boules”? That's some serious, and seriously Freudian, dyslexia. But “boneless” is appropriate.
“She doesn't do walk-ons.”
The top corrections are “walk-nos”, “walk-ins” and “walk-obs”. I have never even heard of walk-nos or walk-obs.
When Tyler lotioned Cheryl's back in turn, she felt goose bumps running up her neck.
Spell check suggests “motioned” or “lotion ed”. I can see people typing “lotion” when they meant “motion”, but “lotion ed”? “When Tyler lotion ed Cheryl's back in turn, she felt goose bumps running up her neck”? That is simply wrong in any universe.
They saw DVDs of the Maddie O'Laine movies, but that was like watching someone else.
The corrections are “DVD” and “DVD s”. I realize that people don't seem to understand apostrophes anymore and will type “DVD's” when they want it to be plural, even though that is possessive, but spell check is supposed to know more than some teenager on Facebook. “They saw DVD...” and “They saw DVD s...” are as wrong as wrong can be.
Her first date was with a young sommelier, played by a struggling actor and graduate student at USC.
The top corrections are “isomerism”, “somewhere” and “slimmer”. Sommelier is a French word, so maybe it should be changed to freedom server, but isomerism is the arrangement of atoms. I can assure you that her date was most certainly not with a young isomerism.
They all went to Gracias Madre, a popular Mexican restaurant in West Hollywood.
“Cadre”, “Madge” and “Padre”. Gracias Cadre might be a good name for a restaurant, but it definitely changes things. The interesting part is that padre is in the dictionary, but not madre. Maybe Microsoft thinks madres should stay in the kitchen, but not have any acknowledgment in their efforts.
Cheryl nursed her niçoise salad and sat silently during most of the conversation.
“Nisei” and “noise”. Spell check knows Nisei but not niçoise. It hates the French but not the Japanese. I guess that is a step in the right direction. But what is a Nisei salad? Maybe I don't want to know. Now, maybe “Cheryl nursed her noisy salad and sat silently during most of the conversation” works, but that is not what I want to say.
She was Anita Lickalott, a young coed at BJU.
“Allotropic”, “Littoral”, “Glottal”. I can see it not knowing Lickalott. Obviously, that is a joke name. Allotropy is another chemistry term, but this book is not about anthropomorphic chemistry characters. Anita Glottal fits, although that would be far more esoteric than I intended. Anita Littoral has nothing to do with it, unless the implication is that she is always wet. But again, Lickalott is better. The scene in question is not supposed to be subtle.
If you ever write an educational cartoon about chemistry, feel free to use Anita Allotropic.
I typed the word “snigger”. Apparently, I have never done that before. At least not on this version of Word.
“I'd never do that,” he sniggered.
Makes sense to me. Spell check wanted me to change “snigger” to a much worse word with a very different meaning.
I generally ignore any and all spell check programs. That might be dangerous. No one types every wrod properly every time. But typos should reveal themselves during the editing stage. And if I mix up homophones, spell check will never notice. “He new he wanted to where his Christmas Satan hat too make his skin Les pail.” None of those words are spelled incorrectly. There is not a single squiggly red line.
So Microsoft developed their own grammar check. It is terrible. Just for fun, I ran a grammar check on the book. It wants me to change “is this a miniseries?” to “is these a miniseries?” I don't want to change that. Some differences are a matter of opinion, but this one is just wrong. It also wants me to change “is this a different battle?” to “is these a different battle?” Come on. That's just illiterate. Maybe you can argue that since “miniseries” ends in S, grammar check thinks it is plural, but “battle” is singular. Even so, it thinks “is these a ...” is correct. Is these a? Be these a? No blue lines.
Most of the spelling “errors” are proper nouns that Microsoft has never heard about. I had to add “Angeles” to the dictionary because it kept underlining Los Angeles. I would never expect them to know every city in the world, but is Los Angeles an obscure little village?
Sometimes, the spelling suggestions are just crazy. It wants me to change “campout” to “cam pout”. Compound words can be a matter of opinion, but then why not suggest “camp out”?
One of the flight attendants quietly approached Alicia during the pre-flight safety video.
The top spelling corrections are “per-flight”, “ore-flight” and “pee-flight”. Pee-flight? What kind of book does Microsoft think I'm writing? And what is an ore-flight? This is not a book about miners.
“Are you trying to sniff out if I'm a lesbo?”
Lesbo is slang, so I can understand it not being in the dictionary, but the options are “boules”, “bootless” and “boneless”. Who accidentally types “lesbo” when trying to type “boules”? That's some serious, and seriously Freudian, dyslexia. But “boneless” is appropriate.
“She doesn't do walk-ons.”
The top corrections are “walk-nos”, “walk-ins” and “walk-obs”. I have never even heard of walk-nos or walk-obs.
When Tyler lotioned Cheryl's back in turn, she felt goose bumps running up her neck.
Spell check suggests “motioned” or “lotion ed”. I can see people typing “lotion” when they meant “motion”, but “lotion ed”? “When Tyler lotion ed Cheryl's back in turn, she felt goose bumps running up her neck”? That is simply wrong in any universe.
They saw DVDs of the Maddie O'Laine movies, but that was like watching someone else.
The corrections are “DVD” and “DVD s”. I realize that people don't seem to understand apostrophes anymore and will type “DVD's” when they want it to be plural, even though that is possessive, but spell check is supposed to know more than some teenager on Facebook. “They saw DVD...” and “They saw DVD s...” are as wrong as wrong can be.
Her first date was with a young sommelier, played by a struggling actor and graduate student at USC.
The top corrections are “isomerism”, “somewhere” and “slimmer”. Sommelier is a French word, so maybe it should be changed to freedom server, but isomerism is the arrangement of atoms. I can assure you that her date was most certainly not with a young isomerism.
They all went to Gracias Madre, a popular Mexican restaurant in West Hollywood.
“Cadre”, “Madge” and “Padre”. Gracias Cadre might be a good name for a restaurant, but it definitely changes things. The interesting part is that padre is in the dictionary, but not madre. Maybe Microsoft thinks madres should stay in the kitchen, but not have any acknowledgment in their efforts.
Cheryl nursed her niçoise salad and sat silently during most of the conversation.
“Nisei” and “noise”. Spell check knows Nisei but not niçoise. It hates the French but not the Japanese. I guess that is a step in the right direction. But what is a Nisei salad? Maybe I don't want to know. Now, maybe “Cheryl nursed her noisy salad and sat silently during most of the conversation” works, but that is not what I want to say.
She was Anita Lickalott, a young coed at BJU.
“Allotropic”, “Littoral”, “Glottal”. I can see it not knowing Lickalott. Obviously, that is a joke name. Allotropy is another chemistry term, but this book is not about anthropomorphic chemistry characters. Anita Glottal fits, although that would be far more esoteric than I intended. Anita Littoral has nothing to do with it, unless the implication is that she is always wet. But again, Lickalott is better. The scene in question is not supposed to be subtle.
If you ever write an educational cartoon about chemistry, feel free to use Anita Allotropic.
Monday, December 11, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/11/17
Sometimes, during early drafts, I will put placeholder dialogue where I know I will go back and fix it later. Later is now. I'm going through all the dialogue and fixing whatever needs fixing. It is not just placeholders. Sometimes a character says something that makes sense in the first draft, but after some changes, it simply does not work anymore.
Editing is almost like time travel. What you change over here can impact what happens over there. When you make the door in chapter 10 red instead of blue, you have to go back and make sure it is always red. Maybe someone casually mentions the blue door in chapter 3.
I read a book two or three years ago where one of the characters was named Emma half the time and Anna the other half. It was definitely the same character. The author obviously changed it at some point but forgot to change each mention of the name. I don't know how their editor never noticed. Maybe they relied on Microsoft spell check.
Editing is almost like time travel. What you change over here can impact what happens over there. When you make the door in chapter 10 red instead of blue, you have to go back and make sure it is always red. Maybe someone casually mentions the blue door in chapter 3.
I read a book two or three years ago where one of the characters was named Emma half the time and Anna the other half. It was definitely the same character. The author obviously changed it at some point but forgot to change each mention of the name. I don't know how their editor never noticed. Maybe they relied on Microsoft spell check.
Thursday, December 7, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/7/17
I'm a little concerned about the structure of the book. Most of the chapters take place in multiple locations. Rather than set up each new scene with an expositional "one day later" or something that spells out to readers that it is a new scene, I simply move from one to another. With different characters in a different location, it should be obvious that it is a new scene, but obvious is not what it used to be. Online, what used to be called obvious is now considered subtle. Subtle is now mass confusion.
My instinct is that anyone who reads books will easily understand. I'm hardly the first person in the history of the world to do this. But what kind of books are people reading these days? If you are used to Jane Austen and Charles Dickens, my books are never going to tax your brain. But a lot of people read a lot of crap. Modern authors dumb down far more than they should. It is not their fault. Modern publishers insist that everything has to be dumbed down because they don't have much confidence in their readers. Maybe they see books like Fifty Shades of Grey on the bestseller list and realize that Austen and Dickens had a very different audience.
It is all serials about vampires and zombies now, or books designed solely for a movie adaptation. If the great American novel is written today, it will probably never be published. It would not test well with teenagers.
My instinct is that anyone who reads books will easily understand. I'm hardly the first person in the history of the world to do this. But what kind of books are people reading these days? If you are used to Jane Austen and Charles Dickens, my books are never going to tax your brain. But a lot of people read a lot of crap. Modern authors dumb down far more than they should. It is not their fault. Modern publishers insist that everything has to be dumbed down because they don't have much confidence in their readers. Maybe they see books like Fifty Shades of Grey on the bestseller list and realize that Austen and Dickens had a very different audience.
It is all serials about vampires and zombies now, or books designed solely for a movie adaptation. If the great American novel is written today, it will probably never be published. It would not test well with teenagers.
Wednesday, December 6, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/6/17
During the first draft, I toyed with the idea of using movies about Los Angeles as chapter titles; Sunset Boulevard, Chinatown, that sort of thing. The city is almost a character in this story, and it is more or less about life in Los Angeles. Movie titles made sense. The only problem is that most movies about Los Angeles have nothing to do with this story. A lot of them are noir private detective movies, and something like Boyz n the Hood would never work.
Before the second draft, I decided to title each chapter with wherever most of the action takes place; “West Hollywood”, “Santa Monica”. There is still a “Sunset Boulevard”, but it refers to the street, not the movie. Sunset Boulevard, the movie, is mentioned, but in the “Santa Monica Boulevard” chapter. That might sound confusing, but it makes sense in context.
Chapters do not have to have titles, but I have always used them. I will do something sooner or later without titles, but I don't think this is the book.
These are the movies I was going to use:
Chapter 1 – Slums of Beverly Hills
Chapter 2 – Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Chapter 3 – Rebel Without a Cause
Chapter 4 – The Player
Chapter 5 – Mulholland Drive
Chapter 6 – Real Women Have Curves
Chapter 7 – Short Cuts
Chapter 8 – Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
Chapter 9 – The Day of the Locust
Chapter 10 – To Live and Die in LA
Chapter 11 – Double Indemnity
Chapter 12 – The Big Sleep
Chapter 13 – LA Confidential
Chapter 14 – Less Than Zero
Chapter 15 – Valley Girl
Chapter 16 – Sunset Boulevard
Chapter 17 – Barton Fink
Chapter 18 – LA Story
Chapter 19 – Boogie Nights
Chapter 20 – In a Lonely Place
Chapter 21 – The Long Goodbye
Before the second draft, I decided to title each chapter with wherever most of the action takes place; “West Hollywood”, “Santa Monica”. There is still a “Sunset Boulevard”, but it refers to the street, not the movie. Sunset Boulevard, the movie, is mentioned, but in the “Santa Monica Boulevard” chapter. That might sound confusing, but it makes sense in context.
Chapters do not have to have titles, but I have always used them. I will do something sooner or later without titles, but I don't think this is the book.
These are the movies I was going to use:
Chapter 1 – Slums of Beverly Hills
Chapter 2 – Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Chapter 3 – Rebel Without a Cause
Chapter 4 – The Player
Chapter 5 – Mulholland Drive
Chapter 6 – Real Women Have Curves
Chapter 7 – Short Cuts
Chapter 8 – Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
Chapter 9 – The Day of the Locust
Chapter 10 – To Live and Die in LA
Chapter 11 – Double Indemnity
Chapter 12 – The Big Sleep
Chapter 13 – LA Confidential
Chapter 14 – Less Than Zero
Chapter 15 – Valley Girl
Chapter 16 – Sunset Boulevard
Chapter 17 – Barton Fink
Chapter 18 – LA Story
Chapter 19 – Boogie Nights
Chapter 20 – In a Lonely Place
Chapter 21 – The Long Goodbye
Monday, December 4, 2017
Hailey's Novel Diary – 12/4/17
You might think that a car accident in a foreign country and emergency brain surgery would slow me down when it came to writing this book. You would be absolutely right. I went from writing every day to forgetting that there was anything to write. I had a pretty good plan and schedule for the second draft, but everything flew out the window. Turning on a laptop was not a priority in Beijing, even if I had one handy. Reading would have been too difficult at that point, and anyone who has ever written a book can tell you that you read far more than you write.
After I got home, I eventually started thinking about the book. The more I thought about the fictional characters, the less I thought about how physically limited I was. Spending time in a hospital really slowed me down, but since I can't go back to work for a while, my calendar was suddenly wide open.
Sitting in front of a computer for more than a few minutes was difficult at first, but there are ways around that. There is no law that says everything must be written while seated. And, here is the shocking part, plenty of books have been written over the years without any computers at all. Shakespeare had to dip a quill in ink. Imagine how long it took to write Hamlet that way. With more modern writing implements, I worked through the next few drafts quickly.
When I started back in March, I wanted to detail every step of the writing process. People are always asking me how I write books. This was supposed to give a little insight. After Beijing, writing the book and blog posts about it would have been too draining. Editing and rewriting was more important than describing how I was doing it. A full documentary of every step from first draft to publication is no longer an option. That ship was scuttled. But I think I might go through whatever is left. Maybe it is pointless to detail the first and final drafts while skipping everything in between, but shit happens. When plans don't work out, you adapt.
After I got home, I eventually started thinking about the book. The more I thought about the fictional characters, the less I thought about how physically limited I was. Spending time in a hospital really slowed me down, but since I can't go back to work for a while, my calendar was suddenly wide open.
Sitting in front of a computer for more than a few minutes was difficult at first, but there are ways around that. There is no law that says everything must be written while seated. And, here is the shocking part, plenty of books have been written over the years without any computers at all. Shakespeare had to dip a quill in ink. Imagine how long it took to write Hamlet that way. With more modern writing implements, I worked through the next few drafts quickly.
When I started back in March, I wanted to detail every step of the writing process. People are always asking me how I write books. This was supposed to give a little insight. After Beijing, writing the book and blog posts about it would have been too draining. Editing and rewriting was more important than describing how I was doing it. A full documentary of every step from first draft to publication is no longer an option. That ship was scuttled. But I think I might go through whatever is left. Maybe it is pointless to detail the first and final drafts while skipping everything in between, but shit happens. When plans don't work out, you adapt.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)