It might seem like I’m getting used to living alone, but I really don’t like it. I want Ryan to come back immediately. I know it’s only been a week, but it feels like forever.
We talk every day on the phone – usually 2 times a day, but it’s just not the same. I can’t feel him or see him. I miss the warmth of his body against mine. I miss feeling his arms around me. I miss feeling him on top of me – or under me, or behind me – I’ll take anything at this point.
Did I mention I’m really horny? It seems like I haven’t gotten laid in ages. I need a man inside me. Specifically, my boyfriend. That’s what they’re for.
There’s a sex toy store in Minneapolis that has this kit where you can make your own rubber dildo. The guy puts his dick in this goo and it gets hard – the goo, not the dick. He should already be hard when he puts it in. It makes a mold of his erection which you then fill with another goo and, after a while, you’ve got a dildo just like your man. We joked about buying it, but we didn’t. I don’t use toys anyway and why play with a toy when I can play with the real thing anytime I want. It’s not like he ever says no. Now I wish we had bought it. At least then I’d have a replica of what I’m not getting.
Lily says I should just buy a run of the mill, non-custom dildo, but it’s not the same. I like the real thing. I also have absolutely no idea if there are any of those kinds of stores anywhere in Hong Kong. This is not the most sexually liberated place in the world. I read somewhere that Chinese men think about work 100 times as much as they think about sex. I think American men are the exact opposite.
I could always order something online, but by the time it got here Ryan would be back anyway.
I need my man to come home.
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No hate, please. There's enough of that in the world already.